Birth Day

Today is the anniversary of Melodina's birth. Last year, just three weeks after her death, we marked Melodina's eighteenth birthday with a celebration of her life. Hundred's of people attended the celebration and thousands of dollars were raised for the Sick Kids foundation, the largest funder of research into cures for childhood diseases in Canada. It was a memorable occasion and our family remains grateful for the support shown each of us and the wonderful generosity both of spirit and finances that is a lasting tribute and memory of the wonderful soul who was Melodina.

This year people who were close to Melodina remembered her birthday in their own ways. Some quietly, others verbally and many with some suitable activity. I went skiing as did Indira, Carter and Hannah. We will enjoy a piece of chocolate cake with neighbours this evening. May of Melodina's friends wrote on her Facebook wall. Harmony has kept Melodina's Facebook page open and from time to time people leave her messages or share something they wish with her in that way. My point is we remember, each in our own way, and the inspiration that was Melodina's signature in life lives on.

I tend to stress the incredible suffering, positive attitude, will power and other attributes that Melodina exhibited in Himalayan ways during her illness. As a parent, perhaps I didn't see the extraordinary effect she had on others throughout her life. Both parent and peers have reminded us how she often befriended those who were lonely and branded as uncool or worse. We have heard numerous stories of how Melodina could encourage the best in people without ever being judgemental or critical. A school music teacher from grades six, seven and eight, before Mel got sick, keeps a picture of her on the classroom piano and uses it to introduce Melodina's story excite students with the possibility of doing their best and achieving their goals.
Melodina received the 2009 Spirit Award from the Sick Kids Foundation. A plaque honouring her is in the main hallway at the hospital. The Sick Kid's Foundation became an important part of Melodina's life. She was inspired by the work they do and Mel's determination to help the foundation in any way she could inspired the staff of the Foundation. There has been over twenty thousand dollars raised in Melodina's name and the donations keep coming in. Some people give monthly, others yearly and many when they are inspired to do so. If you feel you would like to remember Melodina in this way donations can made at www.melodinatribute.org

Remembering

We met today at Chicopee Ski Club. Melodina's sister and brother in law Harmony and Mike were there. Indira and I were there along with our grandchildren Hannah and Carter. My sister Ellen came and skied with us. It seemed to be the right place to be today.

One year after Melodina died we were at the ski club where she learned to ski and where she spent many years summer and winter training to become an internationally ranked ski racer. Chicopee was a place Melodina loved; it was her playground. It was a place I always felt was safe for her. Everyone knew her and everyone looked out for her. It was like a second home - an extended family.

We saw many old friends who knew Mel and in some cases had taught and mentored her. It brought us comfort to be in the place she loved so much, participating in the sport that meant so much to her. A groomer asked where Melodina was. He hadn't known she'd died. We hadn't known that he knew her. He told us his fond memory of the young skier who would wait at the bottom of the hill shaking with anticipation, waiting for the groomers to finish preparing the slopes and put their equipment away. She wanted to be the first one up the lifts and the first one to ski down the hills. Her enthusiasm had somehow left an indelible mark on him. It was as if Melodina's presence on cold winter mornings served to remind him of the purpose behind his job, of the joy he gave people by fulfilling his mandate. Melodina affected people that way. She valued everyone and everyone tended to get something intangible but valuable from her.

Later we had dinner at Harmony's house. Indira lit some candles and Hannah enquired about the purpose. (Hannah had coped with her aunt's death by imagining that she had turned into a fairy) Harmony explained to Hannah that it was one year since her Auntie had died. Hannah said "Oh, its the birthday of a fairy." We all cried and wondered at the wonderful thought of a five year old child that death is really a birth day.

I'm home now writing this to share with everyone who reads this blog. It has been a sad day; a year of firsts is over. It has been a comforting day with many of those who loved Melodina together, family and friends. It was a day I will remember as being appropriate.